I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
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I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
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