i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
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I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
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To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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