ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize