ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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