doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
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She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
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My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
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