if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
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