Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
wow bdsm is so cute
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