so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
there was a trapeze. enough said
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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