I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
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