you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
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Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
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My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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