Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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