Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
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