after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
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I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I have fence marks all over my body
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
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All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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