community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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