at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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