That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Randomize