PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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