So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Reggie can tackle my bush.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
should my penis look like a turkey
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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