Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
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