ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
do herpes really smell.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
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