Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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