I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize