I need help removing her.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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