Texts From Last Night

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  (925): View more from California

  I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.

  (713): View more from Texas

  Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...

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  (925): I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night. (713): Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry... http://tfl.nu/w6q1
  Replies (36) Good night (3512) Bad night (592)
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  (212): View more from New York

  I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..

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  (212): I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York.. http://tfl.nu/qpq0
  Replies (13) Good night (2880) Bad night (418) Order T-Shirt
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  (818): View more from California

  The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".

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  (818): The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp". http://tfl.nu/1x9v
  Replies (17) Good night (2883) Bad night (843) Order T-Shirt
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.

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  (520): Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out. http://tfl.nu/rjf8
  Replies (18) Good night (2769) Bad night (918) Order T-Shirt
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line

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  (201): i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line http://tfl.nu/rmxl
  Replies (51) Good night (10257) Bad night (1341) Order T-Shirt
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes

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  (+44): what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes http://tfl.nu/x7um
  Replies (7) Good night (3190) Bad night (1029) Order T-Shirt
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  (607): View more from New York

  He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges

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  (607): He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges http://tfl.nu/3nw2
  Replies (24) Good night (1255) Bad night (6340)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.

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  (813): So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one. http://tfl.nu/vysc
  Replies (8) Good night (3569) Bad night (2148) Order T-Shirt
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy

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  (519): Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy http://tfl.nu/gpr6
  Replies (6) Good night (431) Bad night (1106)
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.

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  (778): He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him. http://tfl.nu/e3t2
  Replies (5) Good night (1630) Bad night (699) Order T-Shirt
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  (954): View more from Florida

  Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.

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  (954): Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something. http://tfl.nu/6993
  Replies (3) Good night (647) Bad night (685) Order T-Shirt
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  (805): View more from California

  I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.

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  (805): I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina. http://tfl.nu/lu11
  Replies (4) Good night (495) Bad night (859) Order T-Shirt
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on

  (1-970): View more from Colorado

  maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit

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  (970): I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on (1-970): maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit http://tfl.nu/o1f7
  Replies (2) Good night (625) Bad night (246)
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  (716): View more from New York

  I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed

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  (716): I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed http://tfl.nu/55n0
  Replies (5) Good night (642) Bad night (253) Order T-Shirt
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.

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  (773): my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka. http://tfl.nu/3a5u
  Replies (0) Good night (439) Bad night (413) Order T-Shirt

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