I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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