Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
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