I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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