How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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