she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize