whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I wish i was in the wii world.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
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i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
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He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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