haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
I have post one night stand depression
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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