I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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