? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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