i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
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i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
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i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
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