VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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