Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head

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(412): guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head http://tfl.nu/nsk3

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation

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(570): His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation http://tfl.nu/j8xh

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(630): View more from Illinois

i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...

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(630): i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college... http://tfl.nu/0xsv

Replies (33) Good night (2920) Bad night (646)
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(330): View more from Ohio

Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.

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(330): Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt. http://tfl.nu/yvoh

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(785): View more from Kansas

it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..

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(785): it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string.. http://tfl.nu/4pq8

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(817): View more from Texas

he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.

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(817): he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him. http://tfl.nu/kyym

Replies (29) Good night (4196) Bad night (1451) Order T-Shirt
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(540): View more from Virginia

It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.

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(540): It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic. http://tfl.nu/37md

Replies (5) Good night (863) Bad night (2609) Order T-Shirt
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(334): View more from Alabama

This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.

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(334): This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back. http://tfl.nu/st6c

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(917): View more from New York City

Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.

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(917): Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'. http://tfl.nu/jzlx

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

My vibrator challenges you to a duel.

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(610): My vibrator challenges you to a duel. http://tfl.nu/fz14

Replies (18) Good night (3775) Bad night (934) Order T-Shirt
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(425): View more from Washington

Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?

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(425): Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet? http://tfl.nu/nobj

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(626): View more from California

I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.

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(626): I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses. http://tfl.nu/ogb0

Replies (2) Good night (1077) Bad night (423)
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(575): View more from New Mexico

It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.

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(575): It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest. http://tfl.nu/dnlf

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(404): View more from Georgia

I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.

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(404): I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry. http://tfl.nu/xlvi

Replies (1) Good night (492) Bad night (246) Order T-Shirt
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(847): View more from Illinois

I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.

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(847): I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday. http://tfl.nu/imb1

Replies (9) Good night (339) Bad night (491) Order T-Shirt

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