Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
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