So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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