I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize