all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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