I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize