Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
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