question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
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