Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
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