(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
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