I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
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