she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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