It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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