then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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