My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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